Moby: Yeah. I don't know. I'm not that worried about it, because I think that -- I don't know. To be honest with you, I don't really have any issues with eminem. I think he's obviously very talented, and he's a really fascinating public figure. So I don't know.

Carson: What happened at the vmas? 'Cause I saw you -- last year, robert smigel, who does the "triumph" bit did one with me. J.Lo was sitting in front. I rehearsed it last year. I saw you this year, and I said, "what are you doing?" You said, "I'm gonna do a bit with triumph." And what happens is triumph -- people like moby are nice enough to let the dog jt rip on him and stuff, you know, and have a good sense of humor about it. And that's what he started to do, and it looked like, from my ntage point where I was sitting, that it just so happened to be when em was coming back from accepting his award. So he was standing, like, four rows ahead of you guys's bit.

Moby: The people at mtv, it was sort of a comedic setup. They moved me, and they put me a few seats behind eminem. So it was supposed to be the same way. It was like a segue between basically the dog puppet insults me, and then goes and then insults eminem. I think the problem was -- and I love triumph. If they d triumph's greatest hits on dvd, I'd go out and buy it.

Carson: They will in a week.

Moby: So when they came to me and said they wanted me to do a skit with triumph, the insult comic dog, I knew what I was getting into. I knew that it meant him saying really nasty things about me. But he's funny, so of course I went along with it. I think the problem was that maybe eminem had a bad day? I don't know him, so I can't project, but maybe he'd never seen triumph before, so he didn't understand the nature of that, triumph just insults people. He's an insult comic dog. He kind of goes along with the title.

Carson: Right.

Carson: Okay, so let's move on 'cause I know you had a horrible flight -- where was your bad plane trip? To L.A.?

Moby: It was a rough couple of days. So I got beat up in boston, and I go to san francisco, and we played a modern rock show.

Carson: Live 105 acoustic christmas or something?

Moby: Yeah. And with a bunch of bands who I like, but I really had no business being in between them. I think we were in between disturbed, papa roach, slipknot and sum 41.

Carson: Exactly.

[ Laughter ]

Moby: So, not surprisingly, the audience didn't receive me all that warmly. So I was, like, okay, I got beat up in boston. I go to san francisco, and the audience hates my guts. I'm going to L.A., And L.A.'S warm. It's nice. I'll get to the hotel. I'll relax. We take off in san francisco in the middle of a typhoon. The plane almost crashes. Finally we land in L.A., And I'm like, "okay, I just need to get to the hotel and relax." We get to the hotel, and it's been taken over becae e they're making an eminem video.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Of all the hotels that moby goes, especially after all of this.

Moby: I must have had sex with a nun to create that sort of bad karma.

[ Laughter ] It's just like one after another. I felt like rodney dangerfield.

Carson: Did you ever run into him or his people?

Moby: No, I mean, like I said before, I really have nothing against eminem.

Carson: What did you ever say initially?

Moby: It was the grammys a couple years ago, and I basically -- I sort of criticized eminem, but more just criticizing popular culture in general for being overtly misogynistic and homophobic.

Carson: Do you regret any of those remarks that you made as you sit here now?

Moby: I regret directing them at him because it was really more -- I was more criticizing popular culture in general.

Carson: But whose other music would have been considered misogynistic and homophobic?

Moby: I've had enough trouble.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Just say a name!

Moby: There's so much of it. Like, we all know who it is.

Carson: Did you ever think, "maybe I'll just call em and just kind of squash it." Or just say, "look, it was a bad night. Or I had a bad day. We're different people. We're going to run into one another at some point. But I just want you to know this is where I'm coming from." Et cetera, et cetera. Would you want to do that?

Moby: I was always hoping this thing, it would all just blow over on its own.

Carson: Right. Amazing how it lasted so long.

Moby: Yeah. It's been great publicity.

Carson: Okay. Well, there's one guy -- if I was a restaurant owner, I would love for him to be a loyal customer. Let's bring him out.

>> You would either love it, or you would be terrified.

Carson: To try out some of your vegan food from your restaurant.
Say hi to fat joe, everybody!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Carson: All right, fat joe.

[ Laughter ] Just in case -- let me preface this, fat joe's not a vegan.

[ Laughter ] Are you?

>> Thank god I ain't wearing my fur today, boy.

[ Laughter ] I'd have a beef with moby right now.

Carson: No more beef with moby. Let me start with you, fat joe. What did you have for breakfast today? What's your average breakfast? Describe it.

>> Turkey, bacon and eggs. Know what I mean?

Carson: Moby, what did you have for breakfast this morning?

>> I had a similar sort of breakfast, but the vegan version thereof. In other words, a bowl fill of dirt.

Carson: All right, let's dig in. Let's start with something, moby. What should we try first?

>> We have the turkey club from the deli downstairs.

Carson: Okay, that's a regular turkey club?

>> A regular turkey club.

Carson: All right, fat joe, bite that just to refresh your memory of what a regular turkey sub.

>> It's got bacon on it, though. No, I don't eat pork.

[ Laughter ]

>> Here's a vegan --

Carson: What do you mean, you don't eat pork?

>> Dude, I don't eat pork. I'm sorry. I eat beef, chicken, turkey, you know what I mean?

[ Laughter ]

[ Talking over each other ]

Carson: There might be something in there.

>> No, that's vegan.

[ Laughter ]

>> I kinda like this.

Carson: It's not that bad. It tastes like chicken.

>> It's not supposed to be chicken.

Carson: It tastes all right.

>> This, it's vegetarian ham and cheese.

>> Oh, come on.

[ Laughter ]

>> There's no real ham in there.

Carson: That's good. That's not real ham. It just looks like it.

>> Not real ham, I promise. No, I promise.

Carson: What do you think, fat joe?

>> Tastes like ham, dude.

[ Applause ]

Carson: But it's not.

>> Then we have a little vegan dessert.

Carson: Okay.

>> We eating a bunch of fake food right now, man.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: If moby came to your house for dinner, fat joe, what would you make him? What's the home cooking for you?

>> Some steak, potatoes. Nah, I'm serious.

Carson: Steak and potatoes. I'd eat that.

>> You ever eat chicken, and just then a bird is flying through the window? It's like, "damn, I'm eating a bird right now." And the crispiest part is the wings, right?

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Sometimes I'm eating like a hamburger, and I just think about the cow out there chewing its cud, someone's milkin' it.

>> Excellent, my friend.

>> The dessert's good.

>> No, it's really good food, though, for real.

Carson: The dessert's good. For a food substitute, this stuff's doing well. How's the restaurant doi?

>> It's doing really well, surprisingly, considering I know nothing about owning a restaurant.

Carson: Better than britney spears, I see.

[ Laughter ]

[ Audience oohs ]

>> The difference is, like --

Carson: Like britney's watching right now.

[ Laughter ] That's pretty damn good.

>> Are they allowed to come up and have food?

Carson: I don't care.

>> If anyone wants food, come on up and have some food.